What now…?

I graduated last night. I graduated from high school. I GRADUATED from high school.  No matter how many times I say it, I don’t believe it. I’ve spent four years in that drama, filled, teenage angst filled, rumor mill and I couldn’t be prouder to be a graduate of Vestavia Hills High School. We all say negative things about our school, how we can’t wait to get out of here, etc. etc. but the truth is, I’m not as happy about it as I thought I would be. I have been vocal in my hate for school and my readiness to move out of Birminhgam (Alabama, more like it) for the last few years and now, I want nothing more than to stay in my sheltered little community and relive the last four years over and over again.

The ceremony was great. It was so exciting to be able to see my friends graduate and to all be together one last time as a class. It could not have been better. The whole day is a blur to me though. It was an awesome, hectic, day and I didn’t get to completely relish in the moment like I wanted to. When our class president gave his speech, I totally cried a little. Then, to top it off, he concluded his speech with the Irish Blessing. The Irish Blessing is one of my favorite things of all time, and that just made me want to bawl my face off. Not to mention when we moved our tassle from the right to the left, cue bawling.

Thinking about it all now makes me want to cry. I saw some people for the last time, probably ever. Or at least the last time we will be together for a long period of time. I got to see all of my friends’ families that I haven’t seen in a while. After the ceremony was stressful though, because I felt like I was being pulled in 50 million different ways and couldn’t possibly talk and take pictures with everyone. I wish I could go back to last night just one time to remember the feeling of graduation. I was not expecting it to be such a special day, I was kind of neutral on the whole thing, but it turned out to be one of the best days of my life so far.

I’m really sad that I’m not in high school anymore. I always told myself I would be depressed when I was older than the characters in my favorite televison shows (the teen ones… so most of them are all in highschool) and now I am. I hate that I won’t be a kid for much longer and that I’m going to have to face the real world soon. I’m excited what’s in store for me but being in high school is just so set and you know exactly what you’re doing and have no real worries. Now, I’m going to college to be independent and don’t really know what I’m doing.

I’m so thankful for all the wonderful teachers I had at Vestavia. They really all were so great, many of them are a huge part of who I’ve become, and I will miss them all so much. I’m going to miss my class even though I can’t stand at least a third of them. I’m going to miss the building that I’ve spent 5,040 hours in. I’m going to miss having a set schedule every single day, 8:20 until 5:20. I’m going to miss my friends, so much. I’ve also made so many new friends this year and I’m not ready to let them all go. Of course, I’m going to miss my family immensely. It will be so weird without them and life will never be the same starting this fall. I’m going to miss being babied in classes, because what I’ve heard, that’s all high school is. And then you get to college and you’re expected to do everything on your own (obviously…) and I don’t know if I’m ready for that. I sound like such a baby, but it’s true!

To my Class of 2012, I love every single one of you all and I’ll never forget the memories we’ve made over the past 13 years. Thanks for making me who I am today and some of you for making me hate Vestavia :). In all honesty, I wouldn’t change a thing. As Jack said, “May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face; the rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of His hand.”

I love you all.

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3 Comments

Filed under life, personal

3 responses to “What now…?

  1. radaronelson

    Congratulations. I know this is an exciting time. I remember my graduation. A lot of different emotions, joy, excitment, sadness, and nervousness about the future. But all in all it was a great time, I have fond memories of high school and graduation and I’m sure you do too and those memories you will take with you always. Enjoy your here and now and plan for your future. Good luck.

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